HAHAHAHAA
kelly says:
i'm worried that one day you'll up and off and marry some indian guy and we shall never see you at school again

she's freaked about the whole marriage thing because i'm 17! hahaha it was just a totally random thing! everybody else please don't freak out on my behalf! parents are just weird things, you all should know that perfectly well!

sighhhh my parents -aren't- ultraconservative freaks. i think they've just grown up with certain values, in totally different circumstances and they have certain expectations but i think ultimately when the time comes to discuss things like this seriously, we'll all be adults and they'll respect my opinions as much as i'll have to respect theirs. and i definitely don't plan to get married for atleast another 7 years.

hmm my mom's gone for a 'ladies night out' and my dad's working as usual and my brother's at his camp and i should do some work. and/or sleep.

oh my god my mom just came back from some fashion preview, bearing the most gorgeous black salwar set EVER! it's deep black silk with brilliant white embroidery all over the front, and translucent black chiffon sleeves, and the pants are incredibly soft crepe silk and the dupatta is black chiffon with white edging, and my mom never usually buys black stuff but this is BEAUTIFUL. i love my mom. she's got the best taste. now i've got to find an occasion to wear this to. problem is that i usually only wear indian clothes for religious occasions, but my mom believes that black's an unholy colour or something. so i have to find a non-religious occasion. but really, this outfit, i wouldn't mind wearing it out to a movie even. ok it'd be super overdressed, but it's that gorgeous i can't wait to wear it out with jewellery and everything. only thing is that the Flower diamond chandeliers would go magnificently with it. i'm still working on my parents for that one. hee!

i'm finally hungry today but parents just came home and my mom's taking a shower and my dad's at his laptop as usual. yay ok mom's out. dinner now, ta!

oh my god. i feel like pegasus on one of her blogposts.

yesterday i made an offhand comment to my mother - something like "who says i'm going to marry an indian?" and apparently she was very disturbed by it and told my dad. and i think they began to half-suspect that i had a non-indian boyfriend. so today in the car my dad decides to have a Talk with me, and asks if i'm planning to marry a non-indian. i was quite taken aback at his seriousness about the whole thing, and was rather upset that he expected me to be so traditional about everything. i mean, seriously. i hardly know any indian guys. the guys in my class are all chinese, they're the guys i currently spend the most time with. it's not that i'm planning to marry any of them, but basically race has never made a difference to me. indian or chinese or malay or half-brit, they're just people. and i'm glad that growing up in singapore has given me such an attitude towards race, or rather, lack of an attitude. in terms of the type of guy i'd marry, the most important thing would really be comfort and being able to carry on a decent conversation or two. i get bored easily. actually i don't think i've only once in my life been attracted to a nice brahmin boy. ok actually twice. but only once was the guy tamil. ok thankfully i doubt my parents will go so far as wanting me to marry only a tamil guy, but you never know. (anyway both were cases of physical attraction more than anything else. i don't think either one would have been compatible personality-wise, althouhg one of them i'd known since i was about three years old. but he was too old for me. pity.) and then there was a discussion about arranged marriage vs love marriage, and my dad obviously believes in the merits of arranged marriage, although my parents know very well that i'm very anti.

so i got quite pissed off and silent after the conversation, so my dad asked if i was tired and i told him that i was still disturbed by the thing. then he was like "oh no i shouldn't have started it! i didn't mean to freak you out!" and i said that i wasn't freaked out, merely a little disturbed that we had such a strong conflict of opinion on the matter and worried that sometime in the future when i'm of marriageable age, this conflict will lead to one of those bollywood movie-style confrontations about Guys and Marriage. and then my dad laughed and said that he's pretty sure that won't happen, but that both of us have to keep open minds about the issue. i guess that's true, but i believe that i'll marry whoever makes me happy, and i'll seek parental approval because i don't want to disown/be disowned by my parents, but i guess i'll just hope things work out. who knows, i might find a Nice Indian Boy who suits my standards as well as my parents' standards. ugh what a depressing topic. thank god i have another few years before having to add Marriage to the list of worries.

anyway, today after teacher's day and math test and everything i watched 13 Going On 30 with the 1b people - sorry soph, i know, again! and ras came with nasty as well. it's such a SWEET movie! and jen garner is GORGEOUS. she doesn't really make me gay, but she makes me elated! i think i quite freaked ras out, and zx as well, with the squeeing. the rest of course, just dismissed it as typical aparna-ness. oh and the clothes were fantastic. new york fashion mag editor, duh. hahaha. very niceeee. and mark ruffalo's cute, although a sort of squashed version of benjamin bratt. but bratt's annoying, ruffalo's endearing. oh and andy serkis! SO adorable! he almost went gollum at some points.

after that went to suntec to meet dad and buy new sneakers, but didn't have much time to find anything i particularly liked, because my dad had to get back home and drop my brother at ri. he's going for some camp at sentosa, where they're going to sleep on the conveyor belt at the underwater world, and study marine life. i'm sure studying the marine creatures in their terribly artificial habitat there is really going to be a lot of use. anyway, whatever. it's ri. hahhaha and rosie smith's my brother's debate teacher. heehee how fun.

anyway it was on the way back from suntec that i had The Conversation with dad. after that, decided to go with to drop my brother off, because we decided to go to orchard on the way back and continue the shoe-shopping. so i got my new sneakers, and in a fit of generosity my dad bought me really pretty teva sandals. i've wanted a pair forever, but they're disgustingly expensive at 100+ a pair. yay! dad said that the shoes come with a promise to pull my grades up. my mom was surprisingly ok about spending so much on shoes today as well, but she said that i shouldn't need shoes to be an incentive to pull my grades up for promos. which is true. studying starts today. heavy-duty. oh and on the way back after that, the marriage topic came up again, because my dad mentioned that my mom had gone ahead and bought her kaasi maalai today, which she wanted for my wedding or something because whereas most people wear fake kaasi maalais she decided that no child of hers will wear a fake necklace at her wedding or some shit like that (ok it's quite a nice thought, but seriously... a coin necklace?) anyway so then i said something like "oh yeah THAT's when the marriage thing started, and i just randomly asked who said i was going to have an indian marriage and she got so disturbed by that....?" and then my dad said that he couldn't believe i've grown up so much that he's discussing marriage with me, and it seems like just yesterday that he was carrying me around in his arms or something. awwww. daddies are so cute.

ugh i was planning to go home after the movie and sleep! instead i got heavy-duty marriage discussions and shoe-shopping. ok i'm not really complaining about the shoes. but i'm sleepyyyyyy. and it's almost 7 and who takes an afternoon nap at 7. ok actually aparna is just about to. sweet dreams to me =)

most efficient essay i've done this year. started at about 9, done by 1158. and sent off to kwok! ok so up to the thesis was done yesterday, but i changed it quite a bit today. hmm. it's quite similar to matt's though. thanks matt! (if you're reading this, which you never know.. you might. blogs are that sort of Thing.) anyway hopefully kwok will be dense. and claud reassures me that the similarities are quite coincidental-able. i hope so. -prays fervently-

argh next order of business: math test tomorrow. i think i'll just go memorise formulae. no point in doing anything else. blah.

was going to say some other stuff, but can't really remember. math is annoying. it's barely 1230 - quite early by my standards. but i really want to sleep. stupid essay. worst part is i wish i'd done my readings. they looked quite interesting. ok well promos are coming, so i can look forward to those readings.

ok math now, then SLEEP.

my mom insists that i wear glasses instead of contacts for a few days, because i keep rubbing my eyes. she thinks i need new contacts. i know i need to sleep more, although i guess giving my eyes a break from those little pieces of plastic might be a valid suggestion as well.

i am distressed! my mother's coming for the teacher's day celebrations tomorrow!!!!! with her friend, who happens to be gaurav's mother. they've both suddenly decided to become very avid RPA members. how awful. and inevitably she will go and talk to my teachers and learn of my sleeping-in-class habits. ugh. ok but i've told her that i'm going to do some rp stuff and then go back to rgs, so that i can still go watch 13goingon30. after that i REALLY will get cracking on the studying.

ahahahaha vaish just messaged me her dance class was cancelled when she was one stop away from sifas. what a pity. and she could've come with me to red house and continued the discussion of person X. who is really in deep shit. apparently the firing squad idea isn't very good though, for all concerned. X will get defensive and/or cry. we should think of something else.

oh and i just told my mummy that i want the diamond chandelier earrings i saw at taka the other day, in Flower Jewellery's window display. i told her to invest for my wedding early. gorgeous gorgeous earrings. but she wants to buy a kaasu-maalai instead, which is this traditional south indian necklace made of gold coins. i only so far have a fake-gold one, which is used for dance. and i think the whole thing is really ugly and weird, but she wants to buy a full gold one and make me wear it for navratri - this indian festival at the end of october, which is really fun because my mom makes this whole display of dolls. and she has a huge collection of dolls from all over the world - she collects them just for this. really cool. i love fun traditions like this. i don't know what the deal is about the necklace though. i'll try and convince her about the chandelier earrings.

tonight i have to finish kwok essay, study for math and finish math remedials. sigh.

A little girl asked her mother, "Can I go outside and play with the boys?"
Her mother replied, "No, you can't play with the boys, they're too rough."
The little girl thought about it for a few moments and asked, "If I can find a smooth one, can I play with him?"

*

today's been long. my alarm was set for eight. i hit snooze until 9, then just turned the alarm off and my mom finally woke me up at 945. and then i spent the rest of the time making kitson's stuff. and i'm annoyed at myself that i eventually left the class quotes behind at home. anyway. i would like to have been kitson, because the presents were real nice.

ate a bit at home, and then went for lunch at spageddies. the pumpkin soup was really good. chicken stock, though, but i've given up on being fully vegetarian food. it's too hard to resist food that tastes good. vaish says that in my next life i'll be the chicken and she'll be the non-vegetarian. hard to beat that logic. my spaghetti with hearty tomato sauce wasn't as good as usual today. i think i've gotten used to the da paolo arabiatta, which is really good. and the m&s sauce my mom bought at one point, with olives in it. that was really good. i should get her to buy it again. hmm. i'm such a snob/diva. but seriously, my parents don't help the situation. the other day when coming back from safti in the school bus, my dad told me to ask if i could be dropped off at home on the way to school. ok so home is on the way, but if everyone who lived on the way asked to be dropped off it would be a little bit annoying no? sheesh. kelly's place after tanglin, and this time i could use the lift! by myself! but the lift is really quite annoying and kitson agreed that it was confusing. i'm not the only stupid one around. but then we always knew kitson was stupid. hmm. watched kitson opening his presents, watched the video claud made for him which was really nice, and then changed and went to fine arts from there. tried to buy a stapler at popular, but they didn't have the nice tiny type that i had which i LOST. i am still damn annoyed that my adorable tiny purple stapler is lost.

my knee is really annoying me. wound's scabbed over finally, but it still hurts a lot when bumped, and is really stiff. my knee is such a regular casualty, it's got the remnants of about 4 scars i think. ok i suppose that's not really a lot, but some people have nice knees whereas mine are like records of the history of my painful life. in any case, due to the knee, dance was painful. but i told her that my knee was in a State so she didn't make me do moonamandi or mandiadavu. started doing alarippu. quite fun. but whereas i can do semi-classical dance just fine, bharatnatyam makes me feel like such a klutz. it brings out the psychomotor loser in me, because i keep mixing up my feet and the steps and everything. almost fell asleep during paatu when she was writing down the song for me. oh and the templar revelation, even though i've only read all of 14 pages of it, is very interesting. dad picked me up after, so thankfully i didn't have to endure a long train ride back after that.

*

yesterday: blogged about the morning at the zoo already. as for afternoon, i never really did get to sleep much because kelly turned up at 4. hmph. i was just about falling asleep then. anyway it's ok. she came to make the kitson stuff. and i didn't end up doing much, because soon after she came i went to cold storage to buy stuff for the party, and to pick up the kitson box from ruth's, and then by the time i came back a whole bunch of people were at my house and i had to help claud set up in the kitchen and flit around getting various people who were lost in various places. finally ended up with about 20 of them crammed in my room and the stench of socks getting quite bad. ok not really that bad, i'm exaggerating. but there was a socks smell. and maybe there weren't 20 of them, didn't really count. enough to make my room very crammed though. and doesn't help that as it is my room's a cluttered mess. rather like my brain, as i told someone yesterday. finally got all the food done and went down, and ate and hung around the playground and people got drunk and some people are cute when drunk, some people are plain scary.

for all the alcohol virgins/inexperienced people around: drink SLOWLY. if you gulp down beer, even two glasses, you -do- risk getting drunk.

but anyway, some people are cute when drunk, and some are scary. i hate the smell of beer, although it doesn't taste too bad. bacardi will suffice for now, although vodka blue's better. jolly chandy is weird. the smirnoff thing i had in york was good. can't remember what it was exactly, but i have a picture of it somewhere so i'll go check eventually. apparently it's easy to buy beer in pastamania. well, anyway i'll try again at jelita or something some time, and see if i really look old enough. anyway, even if i don't, there's always the "i left my passport in the hotel" excuse, and i can do a mean british accent. although if i'm at jelita in shorts and tshirt it might be a bit fishy.

truth or dare, shootshagmarry, i have never. i'm wondering if it's nicer if someone wants to shag you or if someone wants to marry you. i used to think shag was nicer, because it means that you're hot whereas marry is sort of.. boring. but of late marry is becoming nicer because it means security and reliability and stuff and of late that's become rather attractive. and i really am predominantly straight, although i have had a girlcrush once.

i went up about 6 times to get various things for various people. got quite annoyed by the end of it, but party ended off well when there were just a few of us having a conversation. i'm starved for good conversation. i think that's why clubbing never really interested me much. i'd rather have a good conversation with friends than go dancing with a bunch of hot and sweaty and probably brainless strangers. and pretty obviously, it must be pretty hard to have a conversation in a club. i've never been to one, but i have been to concerts and to dance parties and the music is generally the only thing you can hear. nevertheless, when i do get an appropriate opportunity i'll go clubbing just to try it. but ugh 'clubbing' is such a poseur word.

oh yes. i'm not going to hold parties at my bbq pit or my house again for a long time, because hosting parties is terribly tiring. don't know how my mother does it. and i'm not going for any more parties/lunches/dinners until promos. i'll only go out for occasional movies, which my mother will not know about because i have promised her my full devotion to studying. the movies thing is only because i can't live without my regular trips to the cinema, and i NEED to watch 13 going on 30.

i have such a long list of things to do! kwok essay, math, gp application, rp stuff. gahhhh.

this morning i woke up at 630 in the morning. a rather unearthly hour, an hour it should be illegal to have to wake up on a saturday (thank god for the impending 5-day-workweek?) god knows why the president's challenge had to start at 7-freaking-30, all the way at the zoo. school doesn't even start that early. but then i guess next year i'll have to wake up at 630 every day, to get to bishan.

speaking of bishan and the 5-day-workweek... ms ho's gp lesson yesterday was terribly depressing. and i don't know about anyone else, but i wasn't reacting for the sake of reacting. and i know that i have no real reason to be angry at the school; it's largely an emotional response but i see nothing wrong with that. i'm unhappy that some of the things that make me happy at rjc might be taken away. i know purvis isn't a perfect person and i can see where people are coming from when they say that he's using us and in fact i agree that it does feel that way, but i respect him a lot and i know he's a good teacher and i would be extremely upset if he were to be replaced in my a level year. i would feel wronged, and it's a valid response isn't it?

i'm a little bit confused here anyway, about what i feel and what i should be feeling and all that. last year, i was having a hard time choosing between hwa chong and rj humanz. at that time, the tutors seemed to be an equal bunch, but there was more the issue of hwa chong being such a special little group within the college, and the fact that their openhouse had a proper introduction to humanz, whereas in rj humanz and arts aren't really that seperated, and that some of the teachers are the same, and there was no proper humanz department introduction at the openhouse so it was a bit irritating. but i chose rj, and i have had absolutely no reason so far to say i've made the wrong choice, because i'm absolutely happy here. so mr reeves left, and econs is pretty bad at rj, and kwok's rather annoying whereas i hear only good things about miles at hwach, but i'm happy. my class is absolutely amazing in every way, generally friends are all great, rp is fantastic fun, somehow the environment is good for me. whereas what i hear of hwach doesn't really seem my cuppa tea. so in that sense, if given a choice i really wouldn't want to go back and choose hwachong instead. but then in terms of tutors, hwachong almost definitely is better. and i'm very unhappy with the current situation at rj, because actually besides kwok and the econs department in general, i like all the tutors. but purvis is saying he's leaving, rathi ho whom i've grown to like quite a bit is undecided, and who knows about everyone else. and mrs perry is all excited about her production next year, but who knows if she'll even be around to direct it? i hope the fact that she's all enthusiastic and buying the rights to the play already means that she's fairly certain of her position. but uncertainty's not a good thing, and the tutors that i have -are- one among the things in rj that make me happy. i realised yesterday, also, that a new campus doesn't actually particularly excite me. it's been barely eight months at rj, but i've grown very fond of mt sinai. not just because of the proximity to home, but just the quirks of it. as i said a few posts ago, it's the same way i love singapore. the only thing i could do with is a proper auditorium, but then even in the new campus it isn't yet confirmed that the drama centre will be ready next year. which is really shitty. and no-aircon, on a site that will still be under construction in some areas. really quite the pits. atleast they should get everything ready fully before doing the move, from mt sinai to bishan, government to independent and so on. i would never consider transferring, because i have too much at rj to make me want to give it all up, but the potential changes make me very very uneasy and i don't really know what to do about it. the worst part is that it will be the teachers' own decision to leave, and you know that you're not their kids, they have their lives and everything and haven't really got a huge obligation to stay here for us, but if they make the decision to leave us next year, all we can do is feel abandoned. betrayed, even, however unjustifiedly. i guess it is purvis-disillusionment that's making me this upset about the whole thing, but i can't think how else to react to something that's this important to my life.

ok enough of the unhappiness. good news: 218 dollars refund for the lit trip goes into my bank account and my parents are letting me keep it :) i'm working on making them let me withdraw 700 bucks to buy myself an ipod. my dad says hp's doing some joint thing with apple, so that there'll be an hp ipod or something. it'll be the same apple ipod, but hp'll be marketing or something. so if i'm in luck, my dad can get me a discount! oh and hp's got some new gadget: a watch that's an mp3 player and a thumb drive and all sorts of other things. if you ask me that's straight out of alias or james bond or spy kids. actually, spy kids. the boy had some fantastic watch in that.

i think i veered off on a tangent that has totally nothing to do with the title. the zoo: glenn ong and rod monteiro mcing. they're amusing mostly, but quite annoying with that whole 'brudder brudder' nonsense. a bit over the top, that. my family and i were sitting right behind the president, so we might be on tv/newspaper. which is really eekifying - i had to worry that my eyebags were huge from such a late night/early morning and that the zit mark on my left cheek was so obviously on display because the cameras were all facing my left cheek, damnit, and make sure i didn't dig my nose or anything embarrassing like that. -guffaws- and the president's grandson is so cute! but the orangutans and sealions are even cuter. the orangutan's a coconut-husking champ. and the sealion!!! oh my god it's such a typical cheeky attention-loving californian! it refused to leave the stage-thingy. the keeper would lead it off stage, and right at the end it would turn around, look at the audience and waddle back and slide into the pool. so adorable! it did that about 5 times before finally some fierce guy went and chased it back off properly. anyway some of the most important men in the singapore IT industry were dressed up as tribal chiefs in these really cheesy costumes, so it was really funny seeing my dad's boss who's this tall balding man whom i always see in chinos and a formal shirt, dressed in this.. dress. and husking coconuts, competing with the singapore heads of m1, siemens, ericsson, starhub etc. oh and there were employees from each company to take part in two other competitions: finding little tokens inside a tank full of madasgar cockroaches (ewwww!!!!!) in the shortest time- just a notch short of fear factor, that was. and then grabbing a watch from the bottom of the pool and coming up in the shortest time. ericsson won. but hp did a good job! the representative for the cockroach thing from hp was a woman: i'd have assumed that she'd be really traumatised, but she was so cool! she just coolly dipped her hand in among the cockroaches and searched for the token. but she lost cos there were millions of dummy tokens inside. how annoying. the coolest was some other guy who was so comfortable with the cockroaches that he didn't even do anything when they started crawling up his arm. but still. ew. after the show, went for the vip breakfast which was quite good although they should consider heating up their hashbrowns once in a while. after that walked around the zoo because my brother and his friend wanted to. parents and i watched the orangutan & monkey show, which was cute, while brother&friend visited the reptile kingdom. boys have such a disgusting obsession with snakes and komodo dragons. anyway i surprisingly had quite a good time. but i was really really tired towards the end. fell asleep in the car, then came home and fell asleep on my bed until lunch. barely had the energy to take out my contacts.

yesterday: was good catching up with chit, although we didn't end up catching 13 going on 30 because couldn't get tickets for the 730 show at cine, and then i had to get to womad at a decent time. had a salad and a beer at pastamania. chit commented that it was such a weirdly european meal to buy. but i bought the beer just for kicks, cos chit wanted. i really don't like beer anyway, i just had a little bit. she was in uniform so i bought it for her, and they sold it to me, no questions asked. if only they sold vodka so casually. bought a really pretty pair of earrings. which i didn't eventually, because of terribly crowded orchard road and the veryvery long taxi queue at takashimaya. spent a lot of money at kino, and then got to fort canning at 930. 27 on ticket and program. and $15 on an orange womad tshirt. i am flat broke and in debt. thank god it's the weekend, meanign money on monday, and my parents owe me some money. i have to figure out how much. and maybe when i deposit my cheque, i'll draw some money. i should just get myself an atm card. i never draw money anyway. but getting a card might be extremely dangerous, given my tendencies. anyway because i got to womad so late, only saw temple of sound & natacha atlas, and talvin singh & sultan khan. good stuff, but natacha atlas was basically awful arabian-style howling. which, as i told wiggy, i have a profound dislike for. temple of sound, however, was very good. talvinsingh&sultankhan - laidback, not particularly get-up-and-dance. but was nice to just sit on the grass and chillout. as i've said before, the fort canning hill at night is one of my favourite places around. the last number by them was really really good though, because talvin singh used his mac to play club beats and technoish music to accompany the tabla and sarangi. he's amazing. it's very easy to have crushes on tabla players, for some reason. but i think given the amount i paid, i didn't really feel fully satisfied. i should've come earlier. sigh. combining too many things on one night. got home about 1130ish, parents picked me up on their way back from dinner somewhere so thankfully i didn't have to spend on a cab. although shoojee's dad would have probably given me a lift anyway. got home and idled until 1am despite having a 630 morning today. haven't touched history yet.

ok! terribly long post. i need to go sleep, so i can go pick up stuff at ruth's before hadri and claud arrive to make pasta. what a combination.

not much work done today. most sleeping/hanging around/being fat and happy.

the bernie/chit prank today was clever, if freaky for a little while, but good that's cleared up. egoism on my part, maybe. and too much speculation. people are just people anyway. it's hilarious in retrospect. what a thought, though. ugh. really clever prank, anyway. incredibly subtle, somehow. am still wondering if i'd have figured it out given time. but the wording is quite, quite fantastic. kelly says we must keep it in mind for future pranks, so i will not reveal it here.

alias is happiness... ok not really, it's quite a dark show. but it makes me happy. just sent kelly a whole bunch of michael vartan pictures. hmm. mmmmmmm. beautiful. got her to agree on an Issue regarding them/him. confirmation of what i already knew. heh. oooh being cryptic is so much fun. teehee. in any case, much nostalgia for alias season 2 days. that was a brilliant season. hope season 4's as good. season 3 in my opinion wasn't all bad, but it somehow lacked the thrill of season 2. and a season without s/v sex/steamy looks is a season wasted. this was just a sort of.. sad looks season. oh there's an ep next season called 'detente'! haha how cool is that. i love alias!

ok i should really sleep since i haven't done any work anyway. wonder how i'm going to manage kwok's essay by monday. keep wondering, aparna. don't get down to work. wonder. geez. i annoy myself greatly. not that this is helping either.

i'm not sure why the title's hohoho. i couldn't really think of anything else, but am in a good mood now. tomorrow's one of those indian festivals where women go round to people's houses and take the haldi kumkum (or vetthalaipaaku in tamil) and stuff like that. some women do the puja and have people over, some women just go to the houses because they don't do the puja. i think it depends on your mother-in-law. if she did the puja, then you do the puja because it's supposed to be for your husband. i wonder if it's the same thing as karva chauth. and it's interesting that i'm better acquainted with the north indian customs of bollywood films than my own customs. or more fascinated at least. i wonder if 'familiarity breeds contempt' is a good enough excuse. anyway, my mother wants me to get dressed up and go round to the houses with her, because she herself doesn't do the puja. but i'm meeting chit (finally) to go see 13 going on 3o. initially had also planned on going for womad, but i'm thinking it's not so worth it anymore, because it's about 30 bucks (although a student discount makes it less i think) and i can only make it tomorrow night, and that too for only some of the night because there's stuff in school until about 6, and i need to get home fairly early because the next morning i have to go with my family for the president's charity junglethon thing at the zoo, because hp sponsored it and my dad donated a few thousand dollars to it (i wish he'd done the same for lysis). at freaking 730 in the morning. my parents are guilt-tripping me into going because nowadays i never go anywhere with them unless it's of personal interest to me. sigh. anyway will go check out womad website and see if there's anything really interesting tomorrow. ok there is - coco mbassi, talvin singh, natacha atlas and temple of sound, zap mama but that's quite late in the night. hmm. maybe i'll get ten people so that we can get 10% off. which will make it 90% of $24. which is.... good.

anyway i think i digressed severely. where was i. indian festival. the happiness is because i discovered some of my mom's old saris, and they're so gorgeous! like those really grand heavy silk ones that she rarely wears, and keeps wrapped up in a cedar chest. she opened it today and started taking out saris, and i spotted a really really nice one in off-white, with really striking sky blue and pink stuff. ok not stuff, because the whole thing is woven and the specialness is that it doesn't have little motifs embroidered all over, but is mostly plain but for the sky blue border at one end, and a bright pink (but not blindingly screaming pink) border at the other side, and the pallu (the back part which is always the most elaborate) is like a whole big bit which is fully the blue shade. actually the blue's not really sky blue, it's more like turquoise. a really striking turqoiuse. anyway my description doesn't really do justice to the sari at all, in fact it sounds quite bad. but it's a beautifully simple but striking sari. apparently it was bought for the occasion of my birth, so i'm rather proud. i've told my mom already, that when i start wearing saris i'll definitely steal that one from her. i'm actually anticipating the occasion when i feel old enough to wear a sari. saris are such gorgeous objects, and being my mother's daughter i can't help but adore all things indian-fashionwise. my mom has some brilliant stuff. another sari i spotted today is one she rarely wears because she hates wearing black - this is a fully black sari with a bright red-pink border with gold zari on it. again, simple but incredibly striking. it was also bought when she was pregnant with me, because there's this pre-birth ceremony in which the pregnant woman has to wear a black sari. haha, yay. i will steal all these saris from her. maybe i'll make an heirloom of it and wear the same black sari for my first baby (an event which it's too weird to think of now, i'm only 17! no babies for me yet! although as i said, i lurrvveee babies.) ohh gorgeous saris. oddly the saris of my mom's that i love the most are not all the newish designer ones but the traditional south indian ones. she has two temple border saris (haha i know all the terminology cos my mummy's such a sariho, and every year in india my indian fashion vocabulary gets brushed up) which are stunning. i think she bought them when we went for my dad's cousin's wedding in 2002. gah, so if it's not enough that i have a fetish for expensive western clothes, i have now the realisation that i have one for indian clothes as well, and decent indian clothes start at a hefty few thousand rupees (a thousand rupees is 40 dollars, but a few thousand is still a lot.) i'm definitely going to have to marry rich.

ok to add to my unhealthy habit of fluctuating caps, i also have a nasty habit of doing loooong paragraphs. tomorrow's a long day. must do more math, then sleep. busy weekend coming up. tomorrow: school, mrs perry meeting, openhouse meeting, chit. saturday: zoo, dance, cast party. sunday: haircut (maybe), lunch with kitson, fine arts. and to add to that, kwok essay HAS to be done by monday or else death will be delivered swiftly.

oh. LYSIS CAST/CREW. post-production party is THIS SATURDAY, 5pm until 11 or later, at the PANDAN VALLEY BBQ PIT. bring food. kelly and hadri will be organising the food side of things. for my part, i will provide rasam rice, and on my mom's friend's suggestion, we can barbecue pappadums. my family are very amused by the rasam rice love.

In my not so humble opinion, you, of course, belong
in the Picture of Dorian Gray, and do not try
to deny it. You belong in the fashionable
circles of Victorian London where exotic
tastes, a double life, decadence, wit and a
hypocritical belief in moral betterment make
you a home. You belong where the witty
apothegms of Lords, the silly moralities of
matrons, the blinding high of opium, and the
beauty of visual arts mingle to form one
convoluted world.

Which Classic Novel do You Belong In?
brought to you by

i am happy to announce that i watched my lysistrata tape, and there is a considerable amount of dramafest video that actually is still there, because thankfully wiggy didn't start recording from the beginning of the tape (although i told him to rewind, not knowing that it was a rather sacred tape. but it was a fortunate disobedience, and with another stroke of luck the tape lasted until the exact minute that lysistrata ended - how cool is that.)

only problem: for the entire part that some of dramafest video was taped over with lysistrata, the tape is very screwy and says that the head needs cleaning. but i think that the head's in the camera and not the tape right? yet the other parts of the tape play perfectly, so i don't really get it. anyway, the taped over part plays really annoyingly, all jerky video and stripey. as in, it's mixed up: one stripe of dramafest video and one stripe of lysistrata and so on, with the sound equally screwed up like two soundtracks are playing at the same time or something. and that lasts through two scenes of lysistrata!!! it starts playing normally at the point right before lysistrata enters the magistrate scene when they're bringing the crowbars and everything. which is really shitty cos the opening scene is my favourite scene!!!!!! so there is still much to be upset about. but then from that point on in the magistrate scene, the video's fine except for shaking due to wiggy's laughing, especially in the cinesias/myrrhine love scene. and i realised that the parts i flubbed didn't look as bad as they felt, but parts that feel really dramatic look less dramatic from the audience. or maybe it's just the tape.

which reminds me, is there a dramafest video?? i hope there is, because that was an amazing experience, and thank god i have jireh still on tape going "arts fac......" (expectant silence in the semi-darkness) ".... YOU ROCK!" and then saying something like "no matter what the outcome may be later on, you have to remember that you have done something really good tonight." so, well. outcome disappointing, but that was the first and the best theatre experience for me this year, and it led to so much more because if not for dramafest my involvement in rp would have been so different.

and another part of the video that was lost: jen and my soft-porn dance video to 'singa bonga baba', and probably the porn king stuff as well. i can't really remember what else was on the video. but there's a considerable bit that's left, and it's good stuff. and now i'm going through all my tapes and LABELLING them so that next time i don't tape over such a valuable tape. worst part is, i found a blank tape on my mom's desk, and it's been there for ages according to her, and i could've used it but i went and took the dramafest one of all things. i shall also go and buy some more tapes so that i won't have a tape crisis next time. and cd-rws and dvd-rs. i have a long shopping list. contact lens stuff, new sneakers for school because the sole of my current right sneaker is coming off. which is really shitty because those are relatively new shoes. ok not really that new.. i think i bought them sometime last year, but until this year i didn't wear them much. only started wearing them to school when my beloved white nikes died. maybe i can go this evening and do all my shopping. and that's only the necessities. as i was telling someone yesterday, my wants are few. only three: an ipod, a casio exilim, and a new phone (ideally the samsung 700 or a nokia with a camera.) few but expensive, sighhh. that's a total of about 2000 bucks we're talking about, i think. hmm maybe i can convince my parents to let me withdraw my entire scholarship money and blow it on tech gadgets. i do also want a plasma tv for my room, with accompanying dvd record-player. and a round-the-world trip. and a lexus sc430. and a mansion. and a private plane. hahahahaha. sigh, for taitai-ness. these are the things i do not put on my wishlist. take note.

skipping school is quite boring. i should do math or history, ideally. but i think i'll sleep.

They fuck you up, your mum and dad.
They may not mean to, but they do.
They fill you with the faults they had
And add some extra, just for you.

But they were fucked up in their turn
By fools in old-style hats and coats,
Who half the time were soppy-stern
And half at one another's throats.

Man hands on misery to man.
It deepens like a coastal shelf.
Get out as early as you can,
And don't have any kids yourself.

-- philip larkin

i couldn't agree more. except that i love kids.

s-cube relatively fun, but -such- a waste of time. it took wayyyyy too long. i really should've ponned school today. but the amount of ponning i'm doing is getting disgusting, although not as bad as claudia. hahaha.

but newfound respect for the institution that is ns. what the ac guy said made a lot of sense - if there's something in your life at home that makes you so unhappy to spend two years away from it at ns, then that's something that should be worth defending right? he was nice and sincere, and then when the gavin guy - the poseur mc with the really grating voice - starting speaking it was so annoying. the drama was quite pathetic, although funny at some bits. but it got really propaganda skit at the end, which is irritating. once again, us prs get to have all the propaganda and the brainwashing and timewasting, but none of the singaporean perks. wonderful, innit.
panopticism, haha. nice word, although not entirely relevant.
but i'm growing to be able to admit my affection for singapore, despite everything. where else do you get such a weird screwed-up but pretending-to-be-perfect country that manages to be so successful in some aspects and so terrible in others? it's like the rj campus - the pits but we still love it for some odd reason. it's.. quirky, and that odd sense of a pseudo-utopia, that high-functioning dystopia like ian said (although i have no idea what it means) is quite special. ok maybe i'm just weird but i think a lot of people who've previously had the whole anti-singapore thing are growing to realise that there's no escaping the place you've grown up in, for better or for worse. for better, in fact, because people are realising their affection for singapore. i wouldn't go so far as to call it patriotism, but sometimes i marvel at the little things about singapore that we take for granted, the little weirdnesses that make singapore singapore. i guess it's a good thing.

anyway i've been in a terrible mood all evening, doesn't help that my brother's sparked off a parental argument because he's annoyingly ill-disciplined. he doesn't eat properly, doesn't charge his handphone and then doesn't call when he's staying in school much later than he usually does and -knows- that my mum's the anxious sort, and is generally very badly behaved. and then my mum yells at him and my dad gets pissed off at the yelling and then there's a very different sort of quarrel. and all three of them have terrible tempers. and here i am, this island, this oasis of calm. geez. and i have a math test tomorrow, as well as a headache and a knee that continues to leak and extreme exhaustion to top it all off. the safti thing was a huge waste of time and a sap on aparna's energy resources, despite the fact that it shed light on some important things.

besides that, being high in the rain is good. tiring after a while, but accents and lisps with choon on treks around 'mountainous' regions are the stuff good things are made of. good memories, good stuff. goodgood. and being high during gp as well, i think it was. generally freaking ms ho out, and thoroughly embarrassing her i'm sure. and taking too many weird pictures. class outings are good, no matter how tiring at points. i think the problem was my heavy bag, because i thought it would be a shitty seminar during which i could do math, but obviously not. should've left everything at school. and i should get more sleep. definitely helps with the sleepyhead during lit and econs, and at various points during safti thing - fell asleep during the tail end of the seminar bit, and again sitting in the void deckish thing where the cadets live, and i almost fell fast enough asleep that my legs started going wonky. (haha, i haven't a donkey.) quoting lysistrata at odd intervals is also fun.

and.
ns food sucks.
poor boys.
i will really miss our boys when they go off to ns.
for that matter, i'll miss everyone when jc's over.
sigh.
i think i'll skip school tomorrow.

today's been really quite a day.
woke up way early to get to school for the run, and got very pissed off at my brother because he, who was taking longer than i was to get ready, was making a big fuss about how it would delay him and his friends if i were to be dropped off on the way, although a detour to rjc, coming from pandan valley, is hardly a big deal. eventually i got dropped off at the henry park corner. got to school, stretched and everything, and when walking down to the track from the spex gal, promptly tripped on the stairs and twisted about trying to regain balance, but finally fell down onto the (ouch!) gravelly floor in a very undignified position, having failed to grab nasty in time to prevent self from falling. so i have a nasty (haha) wound on my left knee, my right knee has a small scrape, my elbow hurts and my napfa is still unfinished because ms poon refused to let me do the run after that, in case my knee swelled up and she didn't want to be held responsible. pffffttt. anyway my knee was stinging pretty bad so i went off and changed back into uniform.

bad locker breakin again, overnight. this whole thing is really quite disgusting. some sadistic pleasure, although there is the theory that this criminal is looking for something. A discman and a radio have been stolen so far to my knowledge, but they were probably random lucky finds. The Mystery of the RJC Lockers - Nancy Drew, where are you??? Anyway apparently some J3 was taken away by the police eventually. Hm. Mr Chin suggested that perhaps some ex-students are doing this because they're unhappy that the school is moving. Rather an odd way to express sadness, I reckon. Ugh I've unconsciously transitted from un-caps to capitals again.

today was fun. civics was spent nursing my poor knee, which was leaking pus very grossly. purvis's lesson was interesting after a long time, maybe because i wasn't falling asleep. wow. and rolly's lecture - at the beginning, soph, vaish and i went to see mr chin because of soph's guilty conscience and ended up having a chat about the locker situation. then the lecture itself was full admin stuff, like the survey and the internships (i want!) and then the quiz, which my group (the morons) hopelessly lost, but i fell asleep anyway, and was even dreaming! and then break, during which i stole lots of people's food, and econs during which i laughed so hard i contracted a terrible case of the hiccups. according to kel, they sounded like squeaks and were very distracting. people kept suggesting that i hold my breath, but that didn't quite work because i would hiccup while holding my breath. finally i concentrated very hard on not hiccuping, and it worked! just swallow every time you feel a hiccup coming on. then chinese break, during which a bunch of us had a good chat in the canteen, and due to the lack of bell, turned up late for batchelor. robert frost is actually quite engaging. when batchelor left, i fell asleep, and only woke up an hour later when there was 20 minutes of math left, so did some more of the complex numbers tutorial. i think i get the argand thing! the boys in our class are so lovely and obliging. shane taught me the argand thingy.

then hung around in class, editing the pw survey, and then talking rubbish until it was time for math remedial. diligently did remedial for a while, until i got distracted by an sms from mas at Next salon asking about my free haircut, and then i remembered that i was hungry and went down to get some food, and ended up spending almost half an hour talking to andi and blee. rolly is amusing, incidentally. and incidentally, i've gone back to un-caps again. this is disgusting.

went back to math remedial, and fully lost concentration. got infected with another case of the giggles, only this time sophie started it. (what do you call those people who're the first people to have a disease and then spread it to everyone else? they kept saying it during the sars period. index cases, was it? anyway, sophie was the index case.) and then shoojee and vaish also fully lost concentration. thankfully kong let us hand in tomorrow. yay! had a good ol' exaggerated-upper-class-british accented conversation with vaish while sending her off to dance, and then my dad picked me up, and now i'm home, yay!

i shall go shower and dinner and do my math and rolly position paper!!! haha i hope i accomplish all that. for kelly's sake atleast i must do the history. math, i have the resources to copy from vaish and shirin. i must also tryyy and do some studying and/or some kwok history!!! ugh safti shite tomorrow.. sounds so utterly useless.

today was a long day. interesting 'three-minute conversations' in the canteen with nasty. depressing, though, when you realise that people you admire and respect are people you really wouldn't want to be. living life with momentum and energy is important. and the '3-minute wit'. that's the latest catchphrase.

sort of abandoned sophie when nasty turned up, but hadn't had a really good chat with nasty in a while, so.. that's my excuse. ok not that i've hung out with sophie in a while either, but sophie was doing work anyway and obviously when it comes to math nobody has a shorter attention span than aparna. sophie and claudia apparently are very reassured by my presence, because whenever they're handing up late work they know that i'm behind them anyway. hmmph.

oh i shall belatedly post my, nasty's and andi's Theory of Living in Plaza Singapura, created while at Gelare last monday. basically, you can live in plaza singapura, cos there's pastamania and aunt anne's and kfc etc and food court for food, secret recipe, gelare and mrs field's for dessert, and carrefour for snacks and groceries and stuff. and you can cook in tecno gallery, bathe in grohe water technology (the bath shop), sleep in barang barang or aussino - aussino even has pretty pink embroidered sheets. you can do laundry at mayer washing machines, there are plenty of clothes stores for clothes, the body shop for makeup, spotlight for extra cloth if you feel like sewing your own clothes. there's an atm downstairs, there are tvs in courts or whatever that big tech shop is called, bose for some high-end audio equipment, starhub for mobile phones, world of sports, lingerie shops, there's a hair salon and probably an eye specialist and doctor somewhere as well. and there's yamaha music school for education. as for entertainment, there's the cinema, and ezone. you can live in plaza singapura. omg, there should be a reality tv show! survivor plaza singapura. that would be the ultimate.

carried flats back to indoor gym, ingenious use of trolley and lots of help from big strong non-rp guys, but the rp guys who did help can now prove that rp is not a sissy cca! hahahaa. hadri went off for a run, i later saw him running past jelita when leaving after the pizza hut mini-dinner with shirin, nasty, zx, matt, claud. bought the '13 going on 30' book and stood in line behind gurmit singh to pay for it. accomplished very little math over the course of the afternoon/evening, but it was good fun.

tomorrow i am waking up a full hour early in order to get to school by 7 and redo my 2.4 run. the 7am sun and the fact that i've actually been going for dance of late, should help me to actually pass this time, and then retake 5 items on thursday (for the 4th bloody time, and only one of the 4 times did i fail any of the items!) and get the whole damn ordeal over with. my fitness this year is flagging and failing, and that reminds me of sophie's line in lysistrata. i never had much of a high or low over lysistrata, but today everything's reminding me of lysis dialogue. haha.

another day has passed, and close to nothing accomplished. going to bed soon so that i can rest well for the stoooopid run tomorrow. i should really start going to the gym more often. i promptly broke my no-icecream diet on saturday, and my skin's going for a zitfest again. ew.

EDIT: can someone tag my damn board? it's so dead, it's really annoying. do i really post such uninteresting, unprovocative stuff now? ok don't answer that. just tag the bloody board.

ok down to business, i have to do thankyous.

kel - for everything. (what can i say.) and keeping me sane.
wiggy- music and video! thank you so so much, you super-dependable non-rp member you.
jireh - for being reassuring, and for helping out with the direction whenever you could.
randy - for lights, another non-rp member. thank god for the lights.
smriti - for the super-efficient flats-removal. a new record, i'm pretty sure. i was shocked and awed and proud.
vaish - my darling calonice. the first scene truly wouldn't have worked without you. thank god for you. you rock! we must continue working the stage together.
chloe & josh - for the last-minute turnaround, and making the scene hilarious! i was so amazed, and the audience loved that scene!
soph, vivien, choon - the three loser-bimbos. you guys were so funny, and choon falling flat on her ass and then asking for a doctor was so cute!
claudia - for the tragic scene. hee!
vid, kaimin, shirin - for the direction, in various amounts. and reassurance, and comic relief, and so on. i'll never forget "i get goosebumps when i see something really good." and the tommy girl, haha. smells good.
hadri - because you were right, that 4 days really was enough. here's to optimism!
zhong xing - for being a very good Leader, for learning all your lines and being there for all the rehearsals on time. i can't quite say the same for myself.
nasty&andi - for the miraculous ticket sales.
blee&nasty&leila - costumes, wow!!!
abby - for the sets, and for stage-managing at the last moment.
thong&mel - for decorating the flats. it turned out quite marvellously, i think.

what else is there to say. various other people, whom i didn't really have scenes with or whom i didn't interact much with but who still put in their best, thank you for making lysistrata a success. i meant every word i said last night to the cast/crew, i am so thankful that everyone pulled through. i guess i can't disagree with the people who think it could have been better, but for a fully student run production, which if i'm not wrong is a first for rp, it was nothing short of spectacular in my opinion, and i do have high standards. ultimately: if nothing else, i've learnt so much from this production that it really was an invaluable experience and i am grateful for everything.

discussing crushability factors with kelly (not the usual suspects, though, i'm afraid.) we're both crush-free at the moment, and not unhappy about it. hmm. i can't really think of anyone in rj that i'd want to have a crush on. am still wondering if i'd date a chinese guy. but i know no -really- attractive indian guys. met an old friend at the dinner party today (which i was forced to go to in the end) and he's turned into quite a looker. been a couple of years since i last saw him. hmm. but personality-wise, he falls in the ranks. there was that superhot indian guy at the hilton fashion exhibition last year, what a wasted opportunity. if only my dad hadn't been standing right behind me, i could've continued the conversation decently. ugh. so hot. and he seemed really nice, from what little conversation we had. we didn't even get to a name-exchanging stage, isn't that sad. ok sad-case aparna, stop.

jireh looked fuckable last night. he says he's been working out. such a pity, if only he were straight i could have a crush on him. how depressing.

am bored, and i can't find my humanz scholarship letter. my mum wants it for something. gah. my desk is still a mountain and i have accomplished nothing today. shite.

gah i just spent my entire morning/afternoon wasting time, catching up on lost computer hours (sigh i just can't tear myself away from this evil machine) and then i got so sleepy staring at the computer screen that when i finally tore myself away from it, i fell asleep instead of clearing the mess that my room is, or embarking on that arduous task which is so innocuously called homework. and i just woke up, and am already being rushed off to fine arts although class only starts at 6, but i'm getting a lift to orchard because my dad and brother are going to someone's house and my brother's in an almighty rush to get there quickly because his friends will be there. but i will take the opportunity to perhaps do some shopping. gramaphone/kino await!

i will attempt to wrangle myself out of tonight's dinner.

my mother is -so weird-. i was being a little off, forgetting whether "program" or "programme" was right in our asian former-british-colony-learning-the-queen's-english context, and she asked if i have "magnesia, amnesia or lysistrata". and my dad said that i should've called my character 'roti prata'. well, yeah.. if we'd gone with a singapore context thing that might've been vaguely funny. my parents are warped beings.

anyway, last night went off well, i think. energy high, projection better than the previous night, 8 out of 10 rather than friday's 6 out of 10 according to jireh, scene transitions looked much better from what i could see behind the black curtain. although i flubbed a couple of times, came in a bit too early on the line at joshua's entrance, somehow the "superannuated cow" got flubbed again, and choon hwee fell flat on her arse! but we salvaged that fairly decently i think, and wiggy got a video of the entire thing. only thing is, i didn't have time to check the tape before, so i probably erased something. i hope it wasn't dramafest. i don't really care about china/mexico/newzealand videos. the super-extra dramafest videos... which i still need to transfer onto cd somehow. i don't know how to connect my videocam to my computer! yes i am a technological neanderthal (or something.)

post-production, off to holland v. was craving a good bowl of pasta but everywhere pasta-able was packed, and we were left with kfc so i had a scoop of haagen dazs, a drink from starbucks and a burger and whipped potato from kfc. a very odd dinner, and then a surprisingly intellectual conversation about the templar revelation - a book which i now have to acquire, along with 'a home at the end of the world' and 'angels and demons'. dan brown is quite fantastic, although i have to agree with (someone, can't remember if it was tim or mike.. or someone else?) that plot-wise the da vinci code disappointed towards the end. but the factual side of it, the actual revelation, that was fantastic. but credibility is an issue, being that dan brown is obviously anti-Church. Or to be precise, anti-Vatican, anti-ChristianEstablishment. Something like that. but yes, i have books to read. currently reading zadie smith's 'the autograph man', less than 50 pages in and it isn't particularly fascinating (yet, i hope, because i have great respect for zadie smith's writing.) but come to think of it, 'white teeth' wasn't the most enthralling read either, but it was good all the same. hmm. renewed, or new-found respect for certain intelligent life-forms.

talking about religion and stuff, my mom just forwarded me something immensely interesting and that i largely agree with.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Writer Shashi Tharoor's views on Hinduism and his reasoning of why he would like to stick to his faith:

'I grew up in a Hindu household. Our home (and my father moved a dozen times in his working life) always had a prayer room, where paintings and portraits of assorted divinities jostled for shelf and wall space with fading photographs of departed ancestors, all stained by ash scattered from the incence burned daily by my devout parents. Every morning, after his bath, my father would stand in front of the prayer room wrapped in his towel, his wet hair still uncombed, and chant his Sanskrit mantras. But he never obliged me to join him, he exemplified the Hindu idea that religion is an intensely personal matter, that prayer is between you and whatever image of your maker you choose to worship.

In the Indian way, I was to find my own truth. Like most Hindus, I think I have. I am a believer, despite a brief period of schoolboy atheism (of the kind that comes with the discovery of rationality and goes with an acknowledgement of its limitations - and with the realization that the world offers too many wondrous mysteries for which science has no answers). And I am happy to describe myself as a believing Hindu, not just because it is the faith into which I was born, but for a string of other reasons, though faith requires no reason.

One is cultural, as a Hindu I belong to a faith that expresses the ancient genius of my own people. Another is, for lack of a better phrase, its intellectual 'fit' : I am more comfortable with the belief structures of Hinduism than I would be with those of the other faiths of which I know. As a Hindu, I claim adherence to a religion without an established church or priestly papacy, a religion whose rituals and customs I am free to reject, a religion that does not oblige me to demonstrate my faith by any visible sign, by subsuming my identity in any collectivity, not even by a specific day or time or frequency of worship. As a Hindu, I subscribe to a creed that is free of the restrictive dogmas of holy writ, that refuses to be shackled to the limitations of a single holy book. Above all, as a Hindu I belong to the only major religion in the world that does not claim to be the only true religion. I find it immensely congenial to be able to face my fellow human beings of other faiths without being burdened by the conviction that I am embarked upon a "true path" that they have missed. This dogma lies at the core of Christianity, Islam and Judaism - "I am the Way, the Truth and the Life, no man cometh unto the Father (God), but by me" (John 14:6), says the Bible. "There is no God but Allah, and Mohammed is his Prophet," declares the Koran - denying unbelievers all possibility of redemption, let alone of salvation or paradise. Hinduism however, asserts that all ways of belief are equally valid, and Hindus readily venerate the saints, and the sacred objects, of other faiths. How can such a religion lend itself to fundamentalism?

Large, eclectic, agglomerative, the Hinduism that I know understands that faith is a matter of hearts and minds, not of bricks and stone. " Build Ram in your heart, "the Hindu is enjoined, and if Ram is in your heart, it will little matter where else he is or is not.'
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Ok the article sort of indirectly implies that Hinduism is a better religion than others, and it isn't true that Hindus 'readily venerate the saints, and the sacred objects, of other faiths' - I know my mother wouldn't, and neither would my grandfather. My dad does however have an aunt who's extremely Hinduly religious but has a statue of the infant Jesus prominently on display in her prayer room. In fact that's a common thing in Bangalore. There are lots of Hindus there who worship the infant Jesus, for some reason. It's quite a cool phenomenon. I must find out the reason for it sometime. But anyway, I liked the article so much because it perfectly describes why I like being a Hindu despite all my questioning of and cynicism about religion. why, probably, a lot of modern Hindus like being Hindu. What do you say, Vaish?

ok now i have a lot of work to do. i have to find a lot of stuff in my dumping-ground of a desk, and i have to do three history essays, one literature essay, three math assignments and what else. and i have to join my parents for dinner tonight at someone's place, after fine arts. how annoying is that. i hate going for parents' dinner parties. they're the most boring things ever. ugh.

lysistrata day 1.
pretty good, not fantastic but the audience seemed to love it. hadri's and my scene could do with a lot of work though. my parents said it was great too, yay! tmr we'll make it fantastic. and i'll try and do something about getting someone to video tomorrow.
am SO proud of the love scene. sosososo proud.
i'm incredibly proud of the entire production, for coming from where we were on monday to what we were today. fabulous, spectacular, fantastic. i am so thankful to everyone, and let's finish tomorrow off with a huge freaking bang! (haha, bang. laugh if you get it.)

um. was going to blog, but i should sleep now. or else a headache is forthcoming.

LYSISTRATA is tomorrow.
come.
or else.

hahaha today i am proud of myself. slept through econs and gp, and not a word from salina/rathiho. sweeet.
i think i looked exhausted enough to be excused for sleeping.
and then actually did some work during math. i have about 4 sets of math things that need to be done. hm.
and i skipped econs lec, and am home now for lunch and maybe a quick nap.
it feels nice to be home in the daylight, had almost forgotten what it's like. ok not really, i'm just throwing in the melodrama here. it's what i do. but generally, going home early even if it's just sort of momentary in the grand scheem of things, and being able to laze about a little, is goodgood.
alright lunch calls.
and the new lysis posters rock! even though it's a little late for poster-putting, i'd say.
ticket sales!!!!!

ok just a quickie.
(in typical today fashion, that is a double entendre, for the ignorant among you.)
spending more than 15 hours in school on one day is not good for anyone. but commitment, commitment.
my hair's falling out and i was too tired to eat.
announcement was bad - mike not loud enough for claud/chloe.
incidentally, mike you amuse me. i told kevin what you told me and he also seemed amused that you'd told me.
flats, vanguard mosaics surprisingly pretty, doors, screws and nuts (sex, anyone?)
tech run, tech direction/decision. tomorrow will be good. optimism.

shorthand.
word association.

tree tired.
schoolwork is screwed this week. i want to just skip lessons the whole week.
jireh is reassuring.
atleast it's j1.
thank god.

this post is purely utilitarian, because this blog functions in a way as a record of my daily life. or else i often forget what i've been doing on certain days, so such a convenient record is good.
anyway.

fell asleep during the gp movie, after the first half hour or so. it might've been interesting, but the way the movie was filmed, and the quality of the recording really put me to sleep. it was very annoyingly typical tv-movie, which i guess it probably.
blueslipped after, to go sell tickets at rgs.

sold very little, went to ps to chill out, figure out lysistrata things, and then watched collateral with bernasty, halfway through which i spent half an hour outside the theatre pacing around, talking to mrs perry. i almost managed to count all the green stars on the carpet, because i was walking around and following the green stars on the carpet. after a while i realised that i was following only the green stars and i don't like green so i tried to follow some other colour, but none was quite as interesting as green. anyhow collateral was fairly interesting. the filming was good, incredibly precise. although the plot itself is not anything fantastic. there was all the usual rescues like the cop getting called away at the last minute and the cellphone battery dying, but acting was good and the precision of the camera was really quite cool. and jada pinkett smith is a gorgeous woman but that hair put about 20 years on her. long unlayered absolutely straight hair? not good.

ohoh but noah hicks from alias (sydney's annoying ex whom she finally killed) was in it! and i never realised he was that tall. he always seemed quite short on alias. maybe cos jen garner's so tall. oh talking about jen garner, there's a 13 going on 30 making the movie tv-thingy set up at PS. i need to find enough time to go and stand there and watch the whole thing. watched a bit after buying tickets, but anyway it was too noisy to hear what they were saying. sigh. and OMG talking about 13 going on 30, imdb says that mark ruffalo was the detective in collateral! how funky, a movie with two of jen garner's co-stars. imdb also says that peter berg (aka noah hicks) is six foot one, which is 4 inches taller than jen garner so he couldn't have seemed that short. hmm. i shall go watch season one dvds again which i get a second or two of time, and examine. (yes vivien i'll watch gg first!)

went to spotlight to pick up more costume stuff, then came back to school. meetings, discussions, getting mr booth annoyed, discussions, decisions, rehearsal. and home past ten, exhausted, my poor maid was waiting for me to have dinner before she had hers and thank god my parents were out for dinner or else they'd have been pissed off for my not having told my maid not to wait, and thank god dinner was good because the only thing i'd eaten all day was a potato salad and laksa at rgs, and a slice of chocolate cake at gelare. i've eaten better cake, though. anyway had a very odd but satisfying dinner after getting home just now, of pasta with superspicy arrabiatta sauce presumably from da paolo at my spoilt brother's request, followed by rasam rice with various vegetables. and then a dollop of paul's yoghurt. but i'm all happy and full now, and am trying to decide if i have the energy to go take a shower.
hmm.

AMENDMENT
Lysistrata email address is lysistrata_rp@hotmail.com

site:blogspot.com rgs lesbian
rmun
danny, pinky, tickets

yup i got the second cousin to come for lysis! that brings my ticket-selling count to atleast 6 definites, of people who would only buy from me. and i will send the mail to my sec 4 class. and i'm going to sell to about 3 or 4 other friends of mine, although i am saddened to learn that one who's here on vacation from university, is going to japan on wednesday so can't make it. but nevermind, another 3 or 4. and my mum's going to publicise tomorrow, when she and my dad go to the indian high commission to see the indian flag being raised for independence day. ok i think i'm making it out to sound quite ridiculous, but my parents are very patriotic. so is my brother, actually, although i see no reason for him to be. like me he's never lived in india. i guess there is a connection in the sense that even i do root for india in most things, more so than i would root for singapore really. but my nationalistic loyalties don't really lie with either country. product of being a displaced citizen, perhaps. anyway there'll be lots of indians there tomorrow, being patriotic, and my dad wants me and my brother to go, but i think i'll plead sleepiness. anyway my mum says that we'll delay them if they try and take us along, so hopefully i'll escape it. i wouldn't mind going if it was later in the day, but anything that requires me to wake up at 8 on a sunday morning can go to hell. anyway my parents have lots of very patriotic friends. i guess that's the case with expats. i can't really understand patriotism. i've never really felt it, although of late i figure singapore -is- where i belong and this -is- home, truly. but it'll never be a sentimental thing, and i'm still getting out of here as soon as i can, because i need to see bigger places. i might end up coming back at some point. coming back home? i don't know.. who knows where home might be. but whatever it is, right now i'm bored with singapore. maybe i'll just go and see the world, and then i'll be happy to come back. but right now my dream is to travel around europe and live wherever i like whenever i like and do whatever i like. it's a very generic sort of dream, i guess. but i'm annoyed with having lived nowhere but singapore in my whole life. travelling doesn't really do the trick. i don't know what it's like to live anywhere but in singapore.

ok long paragraphs bad. moving on, i was talking about something. i need to promote more heavily to friends. i shall do so. and now, to bed. i am so tired.

i feel quite happy today, despite the unbearably long rehearsal and some annoying people. 'daring to be different', indeed. for god's sakes.
anyway. let us not waste time on inconsequential things.

perry and mcconnell have ok-ed the play! so lysistrata is DEFINITELY on! next friday and saturday, remember people! anyway did our first full no-stops run for them, and it was actually pretty good! needs some work on the blocking and stuff, but it's going to work!
(too many exclamation marks. i'm not used to them now. hmm.)

heaved a big sigh of relief after mrs perry gave us the go-ahead, and had a nice lunch at delifrance with claud, kel and kaimin. usual potato gratin. good stuff. and kaimin came off his perpetual diet, and had a gratin as well. and then back for part 2 oh rehearsal, and did the nice artemis song, and then fell asleep for a while before doing the tragic dramatic scene again. must go really really really ott. this is such a weird play. i hope it doesn't go too off. now i hope the costumes turn out ok. i hope we get the tickets sold.

then messed around a bit with the music and the cloth, and then went home. and my mother tells me that her friend wants me to dance for some dance in november, for the indian women's association or some such thing that my mum belongs to. apparently rehearsals are going to be 4 times a week, but the friend really wants me to dance for it, and said something terribly flattering like "i don't care, i want aparna to dance". am supremely flattered, because i really respect her as a dancer and all-round cool person, and i don't think i dance particularly well so it's nice, but if it's at the beginning of november and promos are at the beginning of october and rehearsals are 4 times a week i don't quite see how it'll work out. anyway i'll talk it over with my mum and her, and if she really wants me to dance so badly she'll let me take my promos in peace and then go for the rehearsals after that, right? however i myself do want to dance now, cos it sounds like a really great dance and my mum's friend is wonderful to work with. i did a fashion show choreographed by her in sec 2, in the days when i wasn't so fat. or actually i wasn't exactly model-thin back then either but the designer is my mum's friend and she came from bangalore so she needed models and i was one of them. hmmm.

ok enough of the prattling. my mother's mother's uncle's grand-daughter (or something like that) is coming for dinner. i think that makes her my mother's second cousin, but my mum herself isn't very sure. none of us has met her before, but she's come to singapore to do her masters so we're having her over for dinner. how annoying is that. ok i've come back to finish this post, one hour after the last sentence, and the person is actually quite nice. i have an amazing tendency to not be bored when older people are having conversations. and i make the odd weird interjection, which is fun.

ok i'll blog more afterwards. must go and make more small talk. maybe i'll ask her if she wants to come for lysistrata.

ATTENTION EVERYONE!
Lysistrata -- A Raffles Players Production
In aid of Singapore International Foundation
20th & 21st August (next Friday and Saturday)
7.30pm, LT1 at RJC
Tickets for $6
Email orders to lysistrata@hotmail.com.
Please include name, quantity of tickets required and your contact number and we'll get back to you to confirm the order.

People who read this, I would be really grateful if you could put the same message on your own blogs, and spread the word. Thanks

today was fun. actually listened during econs, until i fell asleep (but that wasn't till the end of the lesson, and shoojee says he'll wake me up next time.) i'm turning into a nerd, today kel and i went to the library and borrowed six books for the china essay, but we were good and returned them after school after photocopying the parts we wanted. so the library is not devoid of china books. and we borrowed 5 books for the imperialism essay, 3 weeks in advance. but those we're hanging onto for now because they're really good books and we're going to check with rolly whether he's going to photocopy any of those, before photocopying them ourselves. and shoojee was amazed today when he walked into the ts after school and saw me all alone there, reading one of the china books. he was all "aps are you STUDYING?" in this majorly astounded manner. hmmmph. anyway after lysistrata, i fully intend to do the study-group thing. i badlybadly need it.

what else.
oh yeah, of course: the party at kitson's. didn't get my secret window watching today, because no one was interested. they were all going to paradigm to play zombies (and incidentally i kept thinking it was froggies instead of zombies. about three times i said froggies instead of zombies and confused/amused people.) anyhow i was considering joining them there after going home to change, but i figured i didn't want to be a real-life zombie there so i slept for a while, and woke up at seven! which was really quite late, and by the time i showered and changed and cabbed over to kitson's, it was almost 8. anyway devoured a lot of cheese pizza, almost started playing risk before kitson started freaking out when sophia spilled her juice all over the board, and timmy dropped the grey box and the grey troops were all over the grey floor in the dark and the wind was blowing them everywhere. so he packed up the risk and banned us from touching it. some host he is. went down and played badminton for a bit, and then went to the playground and basically spent the rest of the time there. climbed the big spiderweb thing, and halfway my fear of heights kicked in although the thing's really not very tall and i've climbed the one at west coast park before which is about 3 times the height. stood there and debated whether fear of heights is vertigo or altophobia or "something more guttural", to quote timmy. anyway, i checked and yeah it's acrophobia. guttural enough, i suppose. i always thought it was vertigo though, it sounds so much more height-related. oh we dunked kitson in the pool! and wiggy got dragged in and shoojee got semi-dragged in. and then drenched kitson was going around waving water at everyone, so kelly told me to threaten to hug him and he'd be scared away, and i did but he didn't run away scared so i just hugged him anyway. didn't really mind getting my clothes wet, but i wish i'd brought a change of clothes so that i could've actually jumped in the pool. it's fun to get dunked. ohh and mark and timmy were ogling this caucasian girl with a fairly hot bod. she was wearing a really nice black halter bikini and funky black shorts, so i joined in the ogling from the top of the spiderweb. it's fun to ogle girls with guys. i have a healthy appreciation for the female body, i reckon. but the i think (and mark disagreed) that girl's face left much to be deserved. in any case, quite a bit of fun although we never did end up playing truth or dare/i have never. well, truth or dare merely progressed to two boring truths from me and timmy. but the juvenile activities of the night were fun nonetheless. drinking games can come later.
i will post pictures of kitson being dunked, as soon as i can be bothered to do so.

i am going on a self-imposed no-icecream diet until lysistrata is over. i'm getting breakouts all over my face. it has to be because of my high daily ben&jerry's consumption. didn't eat the ice-cream at the party either. although that's possibly because of my snobbish dislike for any ice-cream that's not haagen-dazs or ben&jerry's or a few others. certainly a snobbish distaste for the walls/marigold variety. i never liked those. too sweet and milky. nothing beats a good pint of b&j chocolate fudge brownie. icecream i can be unabashedly snobbish about, right?anyway when one is on a no-icecream diet it is not good for one to talk at length about ice-cream, so instead i will go read "beyond the chocolate war" (gah what a tasty title.) and then i will go to sleep. a lot depends on how tomorrow goes.

latest searches:
blog tjc
her beauty and the moonlight overthrew you oc
contradictory thoughts alice's adventures in wonderland

in other news, my gp's still not done. i'm experiencing incredible inertia over this one. but then this blog is practically the diary of my inertia, so.. whatever. ugh. must.get.started.on.gp. rathi ho's been terribly nice about this - i must stop testing her patience.

and the school admin disgust me. and right now not even bnl can soothe my mood. am very annoyed with anything and my back really hurts. and i should read time magazine more often - it's interesting. although i'm getting depressed because of this emphatic new impression that the media are all just out to scare everyone, what with the global warming compre, and michael moore and stuff. so i'm not sure whether or not to be terribly concerned about aids in china, the drought and floods in the indian subcontinent, the traffic problems in asia and how soon traffic accidents will be the greatest cause of death, as if drought and famine and flood aren't enough. and there's the environmental problem along with all of it, so after we slowly drop off from traffic and aids and flood and drought, the earth will die and swallow whole whoever still remains. or something like that. and there's also the odd article about the reality-tv epidemic. how incongruous. maybe that's the next new earthly danger. sheesh.

i was thinking today about how singapore is such a weird sort of utopia. screwed up, but i wouldn't venture so far as dystopia. for instance, taiwan has the toughest gun control laws in the world, apparently, and yet their underworld apparently operates around money and firepower. and in singapore thoughts of underworld organised crime and guns don't even occur to us. atleast not to me. i never imagine such things existing in singapore. owning a gun is a concept that is completely foreign to me. i think it is to most singaporeans, and i'm pretty sure most people don't consider or even think about it. is it just that if these things happen or exist in singapore, they're completely masked, or that this society is just so abnormally safe and... sterilised? i can't quite decide if this should be, in fact, a sort of utopia. is utopia a place where you'd like to raise your children?

i ought to stop complaining on my blog, ranting about my perpetual tiredness and stuff, but it's quite an issue that i can't think of anything else to talk about. anyway it's a good thing that tomorrow's no-rehearsal day so i'll come home, have a sleep and then go to kitson's. good therapy. maybe catch a movie in between. secret window's out. johnny depp can do wonders for the spirit. i wanttttt him now to gimme a massage and a kiss (and hot sex, but of course i'm too tired.) my back really hurts though. a massage would be great. i can't remember any of my dreams of late, but if they're not about lysistrata then they must be dreams of going to a spa and getting a good long rub-down and a hot soak in a bath with essential oils and rose petals and stuff like that. everyone else is having lysis dreams. i think i had a foreboding-sort of dream last night, but i can't remember it.

argh my mum's out having dinner with some friend from delhi, and helping her to choose a new camera or something. i want my mummy! the friend's a fashion designer though.. maybe some new clothes are forthcoming. brother and dad are watching the prime minister being sworn in - boring. i almost said emperor instead of PM, i wonder why. oh what terrible ennui. i'll go take a shower now. and read for a while after dinner before embarking on gp essay.

incredibly long day. did you know it's very exhausting to think of titles for blog entries? i always just feel like going aaaaagggghhhhh because the tiredness is in my very pores, my very fingers toes teeth. can't wait for things to get over and life to settle back down. oh for one day that i can come home early and sleep the afternoon away. although of course after lysistrata syf dance practices are going to begin - although thankfully only saturdays - and there are promos looming. secondary school seemed bad, but it was never ever this bad.

annywayyy i don't want to do my gp essay. gah. more than a week overdue. rathi ho's closing in for the kill, probably. oh what would i give for a nice early sleep. had a nap after dinner, then contemplated just extending the nap till tomorrow morning but gp.... sigh. i probably won't end up finishing it. actually i just decided to give up on it and face the consequences. i'll tell her i fell asleep while doing it, and i felt like i'd die if i tried to open my eyes and finish it. i have experienced the dying-sleep feeling before, in fact just today during history my drooping eyelids were killing me. and last week during rolly's lecture, that was one hell of a sleepiness. it was pure hell.

ok i am going to go and sleep now. the world that eagerly awaits my gp essay can go screw itself. and it just hit me very belatedly that the expression is 'bone tired'.

how bizarre. i burnt my copy-protected zero 7 cd to my computer ages ago, when i bought it. and then realised that for some reason, the cd refused to play on my discman. and it's not one of those ancient discmans that have trouble playing various things. it's barely a year old, it can play mp3 cds etc. however, i had copied the cd to my hard drive before ever trying to play it on my discman, so i surmised that that could be the problem. however today i decided to burn the songs to a cd-r, and try that out. and it works on my discman. ironic isn't it, to have to copy a copy-protected original cd to be able to play it. i should try the original on some other non-computer cd player sometime and see if it works. technology is such a peculiarly messed-up thing.

i can't wait for lysistrata to be over. it's paining me to think of it. too many things to worry about. notgood. not good.

kelly is good for me. despite the both of us being in equally frustrated moods, she managed to cheer me up. silly speculations.

part of the therapeutic conversation --

--a tall ship, and high winds are near. says:
no actually i want a boyfriend who can give me a good massage.
Diva! roll the dice and swear love's for real. (lysistrata! 20th & 21st august, $6 -- for charity!) says:
i want to sleep, that's all
Diva! roll the dice and swear love's for real. (lysistrata! 20th & 21st august, $6 -- for charity!) says:
the boyfriend and the massage would also be good though
--a tall ship, and high winds are near. says:
yeahhh. then after that wild and passionate sex.
--a tall ship, and high winds are near. says:
okay, maybe not.
Diva! roll the dice and swear love's for real. (lysistrata! 20th & 21st august, $6 -- for charity!) says:
maybe not
Diva! roll the dice and swear love's for real. (lysistrata! 20th & 21st august, $6 -- for charity!) says:
not enough energy for that, first of all
--a tall ship, and high winds are near. says:
too tired.

it occurs to me that she and i thought the same things at the same time during that conversation.

i feel tired as a tree. i just came up with that expression because i was too braindead to think up a correct one. a tried-and-tested variety. tired as a tree.
kelly tries to justify this new expression -
maybe the whole unwilling to move part.
shoot now i really do want a massage.

oh my god. i -am- a moretard. (another expression i came up with, i think it's quite clever.) there's ben&jerry's in the freezer. i've been thinking myself around the world to find a solution for my ennui, when there's ben&jerry's 30 seconds away from me.

incidentally - kathryn williams also covered thirteen by big star, which is on the gilmore girls soundtrack and is a wonderfulwonderfulwonderful song! haha i love finding good music serendipitiously.

i just bought two cds! rhapsody is seriously bad for me. i was going to go to holland v to have dinner with claud and ian and thong, but then considered bailing and going home for dinner, but decided to go so that i could visit rhapsody and buy another zero 7 cd, and spizza wasn't opening for another few minutes so we traipsed off to rhapsody first, and instead of zero 7 i bought aqualung's first album (which has strange and beautiful on it!) and i got it for 21.90. hmv has it for about 28, and amazon for 27 USD, so i think i got a pretty good deal. also got some cd called 'relations' by someone called kathryn williams. never heard of this thing before, but the guy recommended it to me and it had a cover of hallelujah on it as well as various other covers including songs by neil young and stephen malkmus - the album's entirely covers and sounds good, so i got that as well. and then i felt so bad spending so much money that i bailed on dinner anyway. so now am waiting at home for dinner to be ready. am ravenous. i could eat a horse, if horses were vegetarian. ew. eating horses gross.

i need to get the new wilco album, for that matter all the wilco albums, and 'much more than much love' by finley quaye - guy who sang Dice, on the OC soundtrack.

oh and we walked to holland v by the route vivien and i discovered, except that we walked across the grass field thing. good thing i was wearing jeans. but it was a hilarious and traumatic experience. i must do it again, this time wearing sensible sneakers with the jeans.

it's a horribly hot day. or maybe it's just a rude shock to be in disgusting singapore weather after spending the whole day freezing in lt1. thank god i had my trusty bright redandpink stripey jacket. it makes me a warm and happy girl.

was up until 4 something last night, watching gilmore girls. although i did fall asleep for a while in between. relived the wonderful season 1 memories. happiness. and we have new gg converts! and overslept until i got woken by a panicked shoojee at 9am, and scrambling off home to change and turning up at rehearsal almost an hour late. anyway, hopefully i can stay up long enough tonight to finish my homework. two essays!!!

oooh i just discovered that nitin sawhney and zero 7 are very similar. they're linked together all over the place on amazon. that rocks! good music makes me happy. i'm lately turning to instrumental. nitin sawhney - another necessary acquisition.

i feel happy today. spent the day at kel's, supposedly studying although as expected didn't get much of that done. but looked at her spain pictures and all her other pictures from years past. i maintain that her room desperately needs some colour, but that's me and my colourfulness. i am appalled that kelly's mom thinks i'm forbidable. this is the woman i've been scared of since.. sec one? and suddenly on one day she thinks i'm cute, and today tells me i'd make a good lawyer because i'm formidable. i asked my parents if i'm formidable and i think they were just as surprised. i hardly think i'm formidable. i'm secretly rather insecure - i guess i mask it pretty well. is it very hard to believe? hmm.

then headed off to orchard to find kelly a nice pair of jeans, and to have a look at the kino book sale. saw a lot of nice jeans but kel got tired of clothes shopping (the only type of fatigue that i will never fathom) and it was to the books. i picked up about ten books, and am proud that with great forbearance and willpower, i put all of them back down and bought none. i should stop buying books at a faster rate than i buy them. and i should resist the attraction of a sale. they're my biggest weakness. i can't wait for the film of 'home at the end of the world' to come out, though. colin farrell!

quenched my craving for my coffee bean muffin, but it didn't taste as good, possibly because i had just had a mrs fields cookie not more than an hour before. i have such an incorrigible taste for certain chocolatey things, it's disgusting. from now on, not more than one chocolate thing per day. perhaps later i'll bring it down to once every two days. i'm considering going on the cambridge diet. it looks quite good. maybe first of all i should go on a detox. anyway my parents asked me to get some unhealthy fast food for my brother, so i bought some for myself as well, since they were paying. two potato au gratin =] and then i felt terribly bloated. and on the way home my dad insisted on stopping at da paolo and buying unhealthy pasta with lots of cream and stuff, including some disgusting-looking semolina gnocchi. and i couldn't bring myself to eat any of it, and because of the pasta my brother didn't eat his potato thingie.

finished watching the stepford wives. it's a very short movie. not very satisfying. am now listening to the nicest song from the hum tum soundtrack. it's got saif ali khan speaking in some parts, he's sooo sexy even when it's just his voice. i think it's cos he's got this semi-accent thing going on, because he studied in england or something. he used to be banker or something. soooo sexyy. i like this movie muchly. especially because it's the first hindi film i've watched, besides an r-rated one, that has proper on-the-lips kisses. two of them. and sex on the beach, although not very explicitly. rani mukherji in her gorgeous red sari, on the beach with saif lying on top of her kissing her and the camera pans out slowly. ohhh hotness. (and the next scene was them in the morning in bed, her head on his shoulder, both of them asleep and no clothes on but with sheets covering them, sun streaming in, beautiful and so-not-hindi-film which makes it sooo cool. it's one of those scenes we're so used to in western tv/cinema, but refreshing in bollywood.) lovelovelove saif.

okok i will stop swooning. will go take a shower quickly and head off for my sleepover :) yayyy has been a good weekend. all that remains is for me to remember to burn the potential lysis soundtrack for tomorrow, and to do all my homework tomorrow!

i've just been watching the stepford wives. watched about half so far, i think. very disturbing. anyway my dvd works after all! don't know why my computer refused to recognise that there was a disc in the drive. i will watch the rest tomorrow. now i have to finish watching fahrenheit, which i have about 40 minutes of left. it's provocative and all, but boring compared to bowling for columbine. possibly because there are a lot of facts and figures, and a lot of politicians talking, which is always boring. hm. but it's just as sensational. and it gets pretty obvious that michael moore isn't really seeing both sides of the story either. but it definitely helps the anti-bush case. ol' dubya, such an idiot.

hahaha i just found out that there's a designer boutique on robertson boulevard in LA, called Kitson. it's a favourite of celebrities, apparently. "Kitson believes that shopping should be fun!!" eet eez hilariouzz. there's a very nice juicy couture messenger bag on the website. i want! hee and there's a thong that says "no more bush."and a t-shirt that says "j'adore kitson"! there's another "I Heart Kitson" top. and tees that say "mrs timberlake", "mrs kutcher", "i love my botox", "please don't feed the models".
ok i must visit this place sometime.

i'm boredboredbored. and my tummy hurts. long weekends are a terrible time to be feeling unwell and rotting in front of the computer. i may not end up going out tomorrow, which is very very sad because i had nice plans.