apparently JENNIFER GARNER is engaged to BEN AFFLECK.
ok it's sort of old news in hollywoodspeak, that is, it's a bit more than a week old. but i sort of found it so completely absurd when i read it about a week ago that i dismissed it and forgot about it, until i was reminded just now.

and by god, jennifer garner may have been smart enough to nab the starring role in (what is in my opinion) the best show on television (after buffy but that's not really on television anymore so it doesn't count), but does she have knickers for brains when it comes to romance? HELLO. this was Ben Affleck of the Bennifer. Does she really want to be Bennifer the Second? Does she really want to be The One After J.Lo??? J Lo, who's ironically starring in Monster-in-Law with Varty who happens to be Jen Garner's ex. and she MUST have something really useless for brains (hm am i implying that knickers are useless?) to have screwed up a relationship with MICHAEL VARTAN of the extreme hotness! even if he was the one who did the screwing up (or the extraneous screwing, if you know what i mean) he was stupid. omg i just called michael vartan stupid, kill me now.

ok i just hope the rumours are wrong, but i'm hoping the same way i was hoping when there were 'rumours' that garner and vartan were over - and, obviously, those rumours were more than rumours. and ted casablanca tends to be annoyingly accurate about these things. really has his finger on the pulse, hollywood-wise, however extravagant he may be with the moronic abuse of the english language.

but then i suppose it's a bit like what purvis was saying the other day. i think it was purvis. that he wouldn't like to actually meet thomas hardy. something like that, maybe i'm completely inventing this in my mind. but when he said it i remember thinking about how daph got so disillusioned with johnny depp after watching his 'once upon a time in mexico' interviews in which he was just so... weird. and michael vartan too, is pretty weird in interviews. jen garner's adorable though. but i guess basically it's rather unhealthy to confuse the actor for the character. SMG certainly is not as selfless and well-loved as buffy, apparently. but then there are some people who're just all-around adorable like hugh grant and billy boyd and all.

speaking of purvis, i have a feeling he reads blogs! how scary. i hope i haven't said terribly scandalous teacher-related things here before. oh you know today he put his arm around my shoulders and asked me to give him a cuddle. a) at that moment i just froze and gaped at him, because what on earth do you do when a teacher, purvis of all people, asks you to give them a cuddle?! b) "give me a cuddle" just sounds so WRONG. but then he confessed he was feeling silly, before going on to rant about homosexuals being no better or worse than others and whyy did everyone want to read oscar wilde.

worst of all, i had this weird dream a few nights ago in which ROLLY put his arm around my shoulders in exactly the same way! now i know i'm never ever hear the end of this, because -aps dreamt of rolly- but it was completely a friendly arm-around-shoulders thing, and i can't remember any of the rest of dream but nothing kinky at all. it was just some random episode.

so much for descandalising my blog wrt teachers.