just this afternoon i watched million dollar baby and Boy was i bowled over. it's the most impressive film i've watched in a very very long time, and the first that's made me cry buckets in even longer. i can count on less than one hand, the number of films that've made me cry. i cried at kal ho na ho twice. and tv - i cried at the buffy season 6 finale, and the OC season 1 finale. i've been lumpy-throated and misty-eyed for plenty of things, but the number of films producing actual tears is a grand total of 1, before today. i probably came pretty close at the end of that movie we watched in GP last year about the death penalty, but i have this policy of never crying in school, and generally trying not to cry in front of people. i broke that second rule embarrassingly when daph was leaving. i hope i don't cry the next time i have to see people off. or maybe i'll just have to make sure i'm the first to leave.

anyway. million dollar baby. i won't spoil the ending. it isn't a suspense thriller sort of shock-surprise thing but it's not the sort of place you'd expect the film to end up at, given the way it begins, and it's very important that it stays unexpected for the film to have its impact.

i love the way the film's not excessive in any way at all (nasty's admiration of unexcessiveness may be rubbing off, but seriously this is fantastic work). like its definitely gritty but never had me covering my eyes and believe me it takes very little blood and gore for me to start wincing. but all the same it's raw and it doesn't shy away from blood and broken noses either, and i think it's just the power of the acting and the direction that you don't start looking away from the screen. it's sentimental, and it's a little bit about love, but it's one of those rare hollywood films that don't lapse into cheesiness or romantic mush. in fact, there's nothing romantic about it and that's half the appeal. it's not romantic love, and despite there being every opportunity for it to become romantic it stays far away. and it stays just pessimistic enough to be really appealing. it's unexpectedly philosphical, but it never ever thumps you over the head with its ideas, unlike movies such as The Island which was just brash in-your-face anti-eugenics propaganda. and it was real in a way that "Ali" didn't manage to be at all.

going off on a tangent, "Ali" was really disappointing because somehow it became more about the glamour and the drama and tragedy of his life than about the boxing and the actual genius/expertise that went into his work, and basically it blew everything out of proportion, and in a sense it was just another one of will smith's vehicles, the one where Will Smith Goes Serious, will smith's Oscar vehicle. whereas million dollar baby is so restrained that you can't help but be moved so profoundly. and while it's absolutely oscar-worthy given the acting and the direction and everything, you don't come out of it thinking it's just trying to hit all the Oscar buttons unlike, say, Cold Mountain, or even The Hours or Chicago despite the fact that i enjoyed both of those films very much.

i could go on for a while, singing million dollar baby's praises. i have to say, though, million dollar baby is a really weird title. it's probably the reason i didn't watch the film for so long. stupid reason, but it sounds like a cheap musical from the title. but maybe it has some deep meaning that'll eventually occur to me, abyss that i am.

now i've been hit by clint eastwood fever. thankfully i've got a copy of mystic river as well, so i'm off to watch that now.

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oh but on a completely different note, i squandered a significant part of yesterday reading fluffy gilmore girls fics involving a lot of pregnancy and mushy stuff. and then nasty and i were discussing siblings and whether we wanted more or less than we had. ok the less refers to me, of course, because less siblings for nasty would be negative siblingness which is just... too mathematical.

anyway it's funny and slightly uncanny because this morning my mother burst into my room and gleefully asked me how i'd like another brother or sister. thankfully before my mind imploded/exploded at the thought, she added that she meant a cousin. this means an addition to the adorablest new york cousins!!! haha it's so cool becauseeee i was just being sad the last time i posted about them, that i don't see them often enough and that they'll be all grown up in no time and won't be small and cute anymore. but! just in time for me to be going off somewhere around there, there'll be another small cute one to play with! yayyyy. another silly reason to go to the US instead of the UK. (the first silly reason is american tv and the fact that downloading is Teh Evil therefore i must be in a position to watch it properly.) we all have our silly reasons. i'm pleased!

my own little brother has had his dinner faster than he's ever eaten in his life, and rushed off down to enjoy the Pandan Valley nightlife. whatever that is. he says he'll be back in an hour. my little brother has a more happening life than i do! i am very bored. need to either immerse self in studying, or find more interesting things to do with self. i want to learn how to box. maybe i should learn from soph and actually do the things i want to do, instead of saying i'll do them. except it's so much easier said than done, and it seems like i never have time for anything. ugh.

yeah, so i'll go watch Mystic River now.

also, read this article - very interesting.